{"id":723,"date":"2025-06-18T10:40:45","date_gmt":"2025-06-18T10:40:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/?page_id=723"},"modified":"2025-06-19T11:14:23","modified_gmt":"2025-06-19T11:14:23","slug":"drapp","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/?page_id=723","title":{"rendered":"Drapp"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Krist\u00edn Eir\u00edksd\u00f3ttir<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Drapp fl\u00e6ddi af svo \u00e1reynslulausum \u00feokka yfir alla fleti l\u00edfsins a\u00f0 \u00e9g t\u00f3k varla eftir \u00fev\u00ed sj\u00e1lf. Enginn ger\u00f0i heldur neina athugasemd, nema kannski ein vinkona sem rekur h\u00fasgagnaverslun. H\u00fan kom \u00ed heims\u00f3kn, leit \u00ed kringum sig og sag\u00f0i a\u00f0 n\u00fa v\u00e6ru allir or\u00f0nir vitlausir \u00ed liti. F\u00f3lk vildi bara hafa gla\u00f0legt \u00ed kringum sig. \u00c9g brosti en nennti ekki a\u00f0 afsaka mig, segja fr\u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed hvernig m\u00e9r finnst litir ekki gla\u00f0legir, heldur fl\u00f3knir og erfi\u00f0ir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g er bara svo fegin a\u00f0 \u00feetta gr\u00e1a \u00e6\u00f0i er br\u00e1\u00f0um b\u00fai\u00f0,\u201c b\u00e6tti vinkonan vi\u00f0 en \u00e9g nennti heldur ekki a\u00f0 \u00fatsk\u00fdra a\u00f0 drapp er ekki sama og gr\u00e1tt. Gr\u00e1tt er kalt en drapp er hl\u00fdtt. Gr\u00e1tt er silfur en drapp er gull. Gr\u00e1tt er tungli\u00f0 en drapp s\u00f3lin. Drapp er bein. Drapp er lj\u00f3s, lj\u00f3s br\u00fant. Drapp er volgt. Hl\u00fdlega drapp. D\u00f6mulega, kvenlega drapp. Mamma hef\u00f0i aldrei leyft m\u00e9r a\u00f0 leyfa gr\u00e1u a\u00f0 yfirtaka l\u00edf mitt en drapp sleppur til. Stofan er drapp, bor\u00f0stofan drapp, ba\u00f0herbergin og eldh\u00fasi\u00f0 drapp. G\u00f3lfin eru eikarlit. Eik er drapp. Stigann upp \u00e1 a\u00f0ra h\u00e6\u00f0 og g\u00f3lfin \u00ed svefnherbergjunum hylur \u00feykkt flosteppi. Beinhv\u00edtt og mj\u00fakt og drapp. F\u00f6tin eru drapp. \u00c1sj\u00f3na m\u00edn er drapp. \u00c9g byrja daginn \u00e1 drapp. Maka framan \u00ed mig drapp litu dagkremi og bl\u00e6s \u00e1 m\u00e9r drapp lita h\u00e1ri\u00f0 og kl\u00e6\u00f0i mig \u00ed drapp litu f\u00f6tin, geri m\u00e9r drapp litan latte og bor\u00f0a drapp litan graut. Drapp litar peysur og k\u00e1pur og treflar og sj\u00f6l. En drapp er aldrei bara drapp og stundum er drapp allt a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed hv\u00edtt, stundum allt a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed br\u00fant.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0istofan \u00fearsem \u00e9g tek \u00e1 m\u00f3ti skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingum er drapp. R\u00f6ddin er drapp. Augun drapp. M\u00e9r bl\u00e6\u00f0ir drapp. Gr\u00e6t drapp. Hl\u00e1tur minn er drapp. Bi\u00f0stofan er drapp. Vi\u00f0 erum fimm s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0ingar sem rekum stofuna og ur\u00f0um \u00e1s\u00e1tt um drapp. Drapp var lendingin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Svona tek \u00e9g oft til or\u00f0a. Segi a\u00f0 \u00fdmislegt s\u00e9 \u00fe\u00e1 lendingin<\/em>. Kannski er \u00fea\u00f0 vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 \u00e9g vann sem flugfreyja \u00ed nokkur \u00e1r e\u00f0a vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 \u00ed drapp litu h\u00f6llinni \u00e1samt drapp litu m\u00e9r er einnig skr\u00e1\u00f0ur til heimilis fjarverandi flugma\u00f0ur. H\u00e1var fl\u00fdgur fyrir bandar\u00edskt flugf\u00e9lag sem s\u00e9rh\u00e6fir sig \u00ed heimsreisum fyrir \u00fe\u00e1 sterkefnu\u00f0ustu. Hann fl\u00fdgur hring eftir hring \u00ed kringum hn\u00f6ttinn og kemur sjaldnast heim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Einn morgun \u00ed ma\u00edm\u00e1nu\u00f0i vakna \u00e9g me\u00f0 andf\u00e6lum. \u00c9g er l\u00f6\u00f0randi sveitt me\u00f0 kv\u00ed\u00f0ahn\u00fat \u00ed maganum og byrja \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 st\u00edga undir sturtuna. \u00dear stend \u00e9g og leyfi vatninu a\u00f0 fossa yfir l\u00edkamann \u00e1 me\u00f0an \u00e9g fer me\u00f0 nokkrar setningar \u00ed hlj\u00f3\u00f0i. Einskonar m\u00f6ntru.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g s\u00e9 \u00feig,\u201c segi \u00e9g og meina kv\u00ed\u00f0ahn\u00fatinn, \u201e\u00e9g s\u00e9 \u00feig og vil a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa vitir a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa ert hluti af m\u00e9r, a\u00f0 vi\u00f0 erum \u00f6rugg, a\u00f0 \u00e9g passa \u00feig.\u201c \u00dea\u00f0 losnar um hn\u00fatinn og \u00ed hans sta\u00f0 birtist andlit unglings sem starir \u00e1 mig me\u00f0 \u00f3lund og japlar \u00e1 tyggj\u00f3. Eftir sturtuna sest \u00e9g ni\u00f0ur me\u00f0 dagb\u00f3kina, \u00e1kve\u00f0in \u00ed a\u00f0 skrifa ni\u00f0ur drauminn sem mig hefur dreymt endurteki\u00f0 undanfarnar vikur ef ekki m\u00e1nu\u00f0i, en ekki vilja\u00f0 skr\u00e1setja af \u00f3tta. M\u00e9r finnst a\u00f0 me\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 skrifa drauminn ni\u00f0ur l\u00e1ti \u00e9g hann r\u00e6tast. L\u00edkt og hann r\u00e6tist \u00e1 bla\u00f0inu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cd draumnum er H\u00e1var d\u00e1inn en \u00e9g sit \u00ed hl\u00ed\u00f0inni vi\u00f0 l\u00e6kinn sem rennur n\u00e1l\u00e6gt b\u00fasta\u00f0num okkar. \u00dea\u00f0 er sumar og lofti\u00f0 hreyfist ekki. Buxurnar m\u00ednar eru \u00far \u00feykku gallaefni, h\u00f3lkv\u00ed\u00f0ar og lj\u00f3sfj\u00f3lubl\u00e1ar og \u00e9g er kl\u00e6dd \u00ed ol\u00edugr\u00e6nan an\u00f3rakk sem er \u00feungur og fyrirfer\u00f0armikill. \u00c9g \u00e6tla a\u00f0 dreifa \u00f6skunni \u00fearna, l\u00edt ni\u00f0ur \u00ed kj\u00f6ltuna, en \u00fear er ekki neitt duftker heldur svarti kassinn. Svarti kassinn er sk\u00e6rappels\u00ednugulur og \u00feegar \u00e9g lyfti lokinu, ver\u00f0ur m\u00e9r strax lj\u00f3st a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 var H\u00e1var sem brotlenti v\u00e9linni viljandi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c9g r\u00edf bla\u00f0s\u00ed\u00f0una \u00far b\u00f3kinni og krumpa hana saman \u00ed k\u00falu, fer inn\u00ed eldh\u00fas og fleygi k\u00falunni \u00ed rusli\u00f0 undir vaskinum. \u00c9g b\u00fd til kaffi, fl\u00f3a mj\u00f3lk, helli sj\u00f3\u00f0andi vatni yfir hafra og chiafr\u00e6 \u00ed sk\u00e1l, brytja ni\u00f0ur epli, s\u00e1ldra kanil. Drekk latte. Bor\u00f0a graut. Svo sest \u00e9g aftur, set upp lesgleraugu og fletti gegnum dagbla\u00f0i\u00f0, fletti hratt \u00ed gegnum fr\u00e9ttir af heimstyrj\u00f6ld og ver\u00f0b\u00f3lgu og kreppu og r\u00edkjum sem belgjast \u00fat, brj\u00f3ta undir sig \u00f6nnur r\u00edki, \u00e1f\u00f6ll \u00e1 \u00e1f\u00f6ll ofan, \u00ed heimi sem \u00e9g tilheyri, einsog fruma tilheyrir l\u00edkama; fr\u00e9ttirnar eru af m\u00e9r. Fletti gegnum veiturnar, staldra sjaldnast vi\u00f0, skima fyrirsagnir, ve\u00f0 \u00e1fram. Svo s\u00e9 \u00e9g andlit sem \u00e9g \u00feekki. N\u00e6rmynd af andliti Sylgju. H\u00fan horfir \u00ed linsuna, lyftir annarri augabr\u00fan, opinmynnt og grallaraleg, einsog \u00ed mi\u00f0jum brandara.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sylgja Jacksd\u00f3ttir hefur ekki s\u00e9st s\u00ed\u00f0an \u00e1 mi\u00f0vikudagskv\u00f6ld. Sylgja er \u00fer\u00edtug, me\u00f0almanneskja a\u00f0 h\u00e6\u00f0, grannvaxin og stuttklippt. H\u00fan er talin vera kl\u00e6dd \u00ed gr\u00e1a \u00falpu, koksgr\u00e1ar gallabuxur og gr\u00e6na hlaupask\u00f3. \u00deau sem hafa or\u00f0i\u00f0 v\u00f6r vi\u00f0 fer\u00f0ir hennar, e\u00f0a telja sig hafa uppl\u00fdsingar, eru be\u00f0in um a\u00f0 hafa samband vi\u00f0 l\u00f6gregluna \u00e1 h\u00f6fu\u00f0borgarsv\u00e6\u00f0inu.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Skammbyssan<\/em>, hugsa \u00e9g og stend of hratt \u00e1 f\u00e6tur. Mig svimar og \u00e9g hreyfi mig eitthva\u00f0 asnalega. S\u00e1rsaukinn kemur sn\u00f6gglega og eitt andartak \u00f3ttast \u00e9g a\u00f0 hafa veri\u00f0 skotin. \u00c9g s\u00e9 fyrir m\u00e9r leyniskyttu \u00fati \u00ed gar\u00f0i. D\u00f6kkkl\u00e6dda veru sem situr bakvi\u00f0 runna og horfir enn\u00fe\u00e1 \u00e1 mig \u00ed gegnum mi\u00f0i\u00f0. Sigtar \u00e1 mig. Kannski er \u00fea\u00f0 Sylgja sj\u00e1lf, en um lei\u00f0 er \u00e9g me\u00f0vitu\u00f0 um a\u00f0 \u00feetta eru hugrenningartengsl. A\u00f0 \u00e9g f\u00e9kk \u00ed baki\u00f0 \u00feegar \u00e9g mundi eftir skammbyssu. E\u00f0a hva\u00f0, var \u00e9g skotin? Verkurinn er of s\u00e1r til a\u00f0 \u00e9g geti liti\u00f0 um \u00f6xl e\u00f0a \u00fereifa\u00f0 eftir bl\u00f3\u00f0i. Mig svimar. Svona er \u00feetta oft. \u00c9g skj\u00f6gra a\u00f0 lyfjask\u00e1pnum, gr\u00edp me\u00f0 m\u00e9r \u00edb\u00fafen og naproxen og svolgra ni\u00f0ur t\u00f6flunum me\u00f0 volgu kranavatni. \u00dev\u00ed n\u00e6st geng \u00e9g \u00f6ll sk\u00f6kk og sk\u00e6ld inn \u00ed stofu og l\u00e6t mig falla \u00e1 st\u00f3ra s\u00f3fann sem stendur \u00e1 mi\u00f0ju g\u00f3lfi. Hann er of mj\u00fakur. \u00dea\u00f0 er of miki\u00f0 af p\u00fa\u00f0um. \u00c9g f\u00e6ri mig me\u00f0 erfi\u00f0leikum, h\u00e1lfhryn \u00ed g\u00f3lfi\u00f0. Ligg fl\u00f6t og tek s\u00edmann \u00far sloppvasanum, sendi skilabo\u00f0 \u00e1 skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0inga dagsins, afsaka mig og b\u00fd\u00f0 annan t\u00edma. Skrifa hnykkjaranum og spyr hvort hann geti komi\u00f0 m\u00e9r a\u00f0 me\u00f0 hra\u00f0i. Baki\u00f0 hafi gefi\u00f0 sig enn eina fer\u00f0ina. Svo loka \u00e9g augunum og leyfi Naproxen og \u00cdb\u00fafen a\u00f0 vinna s\u00edna vinnu. Loka augunum, finnst einsog eitthva\u00f0 sitji fast \u00ed v\u00f6\u00f0va. Kalt st\u00e1l. Finnst einsog undir m\u00e9r s\u00e9 a\u00f0 myndast bl\u00f3\u00f0pollur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vi\u00f0 h\u00f6f\u00f0um funda\u00f0. \u00c9g og hinir s\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0ingarnir \u00e1samt innanh\u00fasark\u00edtekt og hentum \u00e1 milli hugmyndum \u00e1\u00f0ur en hann h\u00e6fist handa vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 innr\u00e9tta kuldalegt g\u00edmald sem vi\u00f0 t\u00f3kum \u00e1 leigu \u00ed i\u00f0na\u00f0arhverfi vi\u00f0 b\u00e6jarm\u00f6rkin. Innanh\u00fasark\u00edtektinn l\u00fdsti \u00fev\u00ed hvernig hann t\u00e6ki hlutverk sitt alvarlega, a\u00f0 hanna upplifun skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0inganna af \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 brj\u00f3tast gegnum \u00fe\u00e1 himnu<\/em> sem oft v\u00e6ri fyrirsta\u00f0a, en \u00ed tilfelli \u00feeirra sem v\u00e6ru komin svona langt \u2013 a\u00f0 sitja \u00fearna \u00e1 bi\u00f0stofunni \u2013 v\u00e6ri \u00feessi himna a\u00f0 rofna<\/em>. Setan \u00e1 bi\u00f0stofunni v\u00e6ri rof \u00e1 himnu. Litirnir sem komu til hans voru eggjaskurnsbl\u00e1r og rau\u00f0bleikur. Einsog eggjaskurnin sem brotnar og n\u00fdtt l\u00edf l\u00edtur dagsins lj\u00f3s e\u00f0a einsog a\u00f0 horfa \u00e1 heiminn \u00far m\u00f3\u00f0urkvi\u00f0i, horfa \u00far myrkrinu \u00ed lj\u00f3si\u00f0. Dj\u00fap-appels\u00ednugulur leita\u00f0i \u00e1 hann, jafnvel r\u00fastrau\u00f0ur. Bl\u00e6\u00f0ing<\/em>, sag\u00f0i hann, sem er \u00fe\u00f3 eggjarau\u00f0a sem rennur. \u00c9g fylltist hryllingi \u00feegar hann f\u00f3r a\u00f0 tala um \u00feann dumbrau\u00f0a br\u00fana t\u00f3n sem \u00ed austri v\u00e6ru oft para\u00f0ir me\u00f0 appels\u00ednugulum og k\u00f6ldum f\u00f6lbleikum. Hugsi\u00f0 munkaklaustur. Hugsi\u00f0 ork\u00eddeur<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eHva\u00f0 me\u00f0 bara drapp?\u201c missti \u00e9g \u00fat \u00far m\u00e9r og \u00fea\u00f0 kom \u00e1 innanh\u00fasark\u00edtektinn sem snar\u00feagna\u00f0i.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eDrapp<\/em> er hlutlaust og r\u00f3andi,\u201c h\u00e9lt \u00e9g \u00e1fram og samstarfsf\u00f3lki\u00f0 gat teki\u00f0 undir \u00fea\u00f0.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eVi\u00f0 viljum heldur ekki vekja upp of sterk \u00e1hrif e\u00f0a h\u00e6tta \u00e1 a\u00f0 triggera f\u00f3lk r\u00e9tt \u00e1\u00f0ur en t\u00edminn byrjar,\u201c sag\u00f0i einn og vi\u00f0 kinku\u00f0um kolli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eSvo var \u00e9g a\u00f0 sp\u00e1 hvort vi\u00f0 \u00e6ttum a\u00f0 hafa einhverjar setningar \u00e1 veggjunum, einhverjar svona j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0ar?\u201c b\u00e6tti \u00f6nnur vi\u00f0 og vi\u00f0 veltum fyrir okkur hvort \u00fea\u00f0 \u00e6ttu a\u00f0 vera setningar \u00ed ramma e\u00f0a l\u00edmmi\u00f0ar sem f\u00e6ru beint \u00e1 veggina. Innanh\u00fasark\u00edtektinn spur\u00f0i ni\u00f0url\u00fatur hva\u00f0a setningar vi\u00f0 hef\u00f0um \u00ed huga.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eBara eitthva\u00f0 uppbyggjandi,\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00e9g, \u00e1n\u00e6g\u00f0 me\u00f0 a\u00f0 hann v\u00e6ri h\u00e6ttur a\u00f0 romsa upp\u00far s\u00e9r litaheitum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eLive, laugh, love …\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00fe\u00e1 einhver og flissa\u00f0i. Vi\u00f0 vorum a\u00f0 str\u00ed\u00f0a innanh\u00fasark\u00edtektinum. \u201eNei … keep calm and carry on<\/em>,\u201c sag\u00f0i annar og okkur fannst \u00fea\u00f0 \u00f6llum mj\u00f6g spaugilegt l\u00edka. Innanh\u00fasark\u00edtektinn var or\u00f0inn ringla\u00f0ur. \u201eHva\u00f0 me\u00f0 fiskab\u00far?\u201c spur\u00f0i hann varlega og \u00e6tla\u00f0i a\u00f0 fara a\u00f0 s\u00fdna okkur skissur en hugmyndin var skotin \u00e1 kaf alveg um lei\u00f0. Alltof d\u00fdrt og miki\u00f0 vesen og svo voru svona fiskar frekar \u00f3ge\u00f0slegir \u00ed raun, \u00e1tu stundum andlitin hver af \u00f6\u00f0rum og syntu um einsog h\u00e1lf\u00e9tnar m\u00e1lt\u00ed\u00f0ir, alltaf gapandi \u00ed spurn. Vi\u00f0 hrylltum okkur. \u201eHva\u00f0 me\u00f0 flatskj\u00e1i sem s\u00fdndu dr\u00f3namyndir af austr\u00e6num hofum og regnsk\u00f3gum og fossum?\u201c stakk einhver upp\u00e1 og ark\u00edtektinn gafst upp. Drapp var\u00f0 lendingin. Bi\u00f0stofan var drapp og allt \u00e1 henni var drapp nema dr\u00f3nav\u00edde\u00f3in \u00e1 flatskj\u00e1num sem s\u00fdndu austr\u00e6n hof og regnsk\u00f3ga og fossa. Huglei\u00f0slut\u00f3nlist \u00f3ma\u00f0i og svo voru l\u00edka raka og loftr\u00e6stit\u00e6ki \u00e1 stangli vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 m\u00f6gulega var mygla. \u00d6rugglega mygla en samt var lofti\u00f0 l\u00edka \u00feurrt og ertandi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Svo haf\u00f0i veri\u00f0 haldinn fundur til \u00feess a\u00f0 velja nafn \u00e1 stofuna. \u201eFl\u00f3kna \u00e1fallavinnslan,\u201c haf\u00f0i einhver sagt og \u00f6nnur stakk upp\u00e1 \u201eKomplexi\u00f0.\u201c \u201e\u00darvinnslan,\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00feri\u00f0ja en \u00e9g benti \u00e1 a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 \u00feyrfti a\u00f0 vera eitthva\u00f0 sem kalla\u00f0i \u00e1 j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0a sv\u00f6run. \u201eN\u00f3g er n\u00fa samt,\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00e9g.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hva\u00f0 me\u00f0 \u201eHugarr\u00f3,\u201c sag\u00f0i einhver. E\u00f0a \u201eUpphafi\u00f0,\u201c e\u00f0a \u201eUmmyndanir\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cE\u00f0a Sj\u00e1lf<\/em>,\u201c lag\u00f0i \u00e9g til. S\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0istofan Sj\u00e1lf<\/em>. Vi\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f6gnu\u00f0um \u00f6ll. \u00d6ll vorum vi\u00f0 misjafnlega upptekin af n\u00e1lgun sem f\u00f3l \u00ed s\u00e9r \u00fe\u00e1 hugmynd a\u00f0 innra me\u00f0 \u00f6llu f\u00f3lki v\u00e6ri sj\u00e1lf <\/em>sem \u00e1f\u00f6llin n\u00e6\u00f0u ekki til. Markmi\u00f0i\u00f0 var \u00feessvegna a\u00f0 hj\u00e1lpa skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingum a\u00f0 komast \u00ed tengingu vi\u00f0 \u00feetta innra sj\u00e1lf og leyfa \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 ver\u00f0a lei\u00f0andi. \u00deetta sj\u00e1lf sem \u00e1tti a\u00f0 ver\u00f0a lei\u00f0andi var a\u00f0 einhverju leyti dularfullt og \u00feessvegna yfirleitt ekki \u00fea\u00f0 fyrsta sem vi\u00f0 s\u00f6g\u00f0um fr\u00e1. A\u00f0 \u00e1f\u00f6llin n\u00e6\u00f0u ekki til sj\u00e1lfsins, a\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfi\u00f0 h\u00e9ldist \u00fer\u00e1tt fyrir \u00e1f\u00f6llin og alla \u00feessa misjafnlega ska\u00f0legu varnarmekkanisma sem \u00feau k\u00f6llu\u00f0u fram, t\u00e6rt<\/em>, minnti \u00e1 stef innan tr\u00faarbrag\u00f0a, en \u00fea\u00f0 sem vi\u00f0 vorum a\u00f0 gera haf\u00f0i samt ekkert me\u00f0 tr\u00faarbr\u00f6g\u00f0 a\u00f0 gera. \u00deetta var tilviljun. \u00der\u00f3unin innan \u00e1fallafr\u00e6\u00f0anna, sem bygg\u00f0i \u00e1 \u00f3tal gagnreyndum ranns\u00f3knum framkv\u00e6mdum af v\u00edsindalegri n\u00e1kv\u00e6mni, haf\u00f0i einfaldlega leitt okkur hinga\u00f0. Sj\u00e1lf<\/em> var samt hla\u00f0i\u00f0 or\u00f0, heimspekilegt or\u00f0, margr\u00e6tt. Or\u00f0 sem kalla\u00f0i \u00f3sj\u00e1lfr\u00e1tt \u00e1 hugarleikfimi og jafnvel tilvistarangist, en var \u00fe\u00f3 st\u00f6\u00f0ugt haft \u00ed flimtingum, einsog um eitthva\u00f0 einfalt v\u00e6ri a\u00f0 r\u00e6\u00f0a. Einsog nokkur vissi hva\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fdddi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eS\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0istofan Sj\u00e1lf<\/em> … kannski er \u00fea\u00f0 svol\u00edti\u00f0 gott …\u201c sag\u00f0i einhver. \u201eMun f\u00f3lk ekki mism\u00e6la sig? sag\u00f0i annar, \u201esegja Sj\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0istofan S\u00e1l …\u201c en vi\u00f0 vorum samm\u00e1la um a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 v\u00e6ri \u00fe\u00e1 bara allt \u00ed lagi. Sj\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0i s\u00e1larinnar v\u00e6ri ekki verra, og vi\u00f0 hl\u00f3gum a\u00f0eins a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed og vorum flj\u00f3tlega einr\u00f3ma samm\u00e1la um a\u00f0 nafni\u00f0 yr\u00f0i Sj\u00e1lf<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u00ed\u00f0an voru li\u00f0in fimm \u00e1r og rekstur S\u00e1lfr\u00e6\u00f0istofunnar Sj\u00e1lfs gekk vonum framar. Vi\u00f0 sem \u00fear st\u00f6rfu\u00f0um vorum \u00f6ll eftirs\u00f3tt og \u00e1ttum sameiginlegt a\u00f0 vera s\u00e9rh\u00e6f\u00f0ust \u00e1 landinu \u00ed a\u00f0 veita me\u00f0fer\u00f0 vegna fl\u00f3kinna \u00e1falla. Fl\u00f3kin \u00e1f\u00f6ll voru einmitt miki\u00f0 \u00ed umr\u00e6\u00f0unni og me\u00f0fer\u00f0in t\u00f3k lengri t\u00edma en me\u00f0fer\u00f0 vi\u00f0 d\u00e6miger\u00f0ri \u00e1fallastreitu sem orsaka\u00f0ist frekar af st\u00f6kum atbur\u00f0um. Skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingarnir okkar \u00e1ttu flest sameiginlegt a\u00f0 hafa lifa\u00f0 vi\u00f0 \u00e1f\u00f6ll \u00ed lengri t\u00edma. Til d\u00e6mis h\u00f6f\u00f0u \u00feau veri\u00f0 beitt ofbeldi \u00ed uppvextinum e\u00f0a veri\u00f0 \u00ed langvarandi ofbeldissambandi. Sum h\u00f6f\u00f0u or\u00f0i\u00f0 fyrir bar\u00f0inu \u00e1 einelti \u00ed sk\u00f3la e\u00f0a \u00e1 vinnusta\u00f0. \u00deannig haf\u00f0i umhverfi\u00f0 n\u00e1\u00f0 a\u00f0 m\u00f3ta sj\u00e1lfsmynd \u00feeirra \u00e1 lengri t\u00edma og \u00e1fallastreitan sem \u00feessar a\u00f0st\u00e6\u00f0ur g\u00e1tu valdi\u00f0 var \u00feessvegna k\u00f6llu\u00f0 fl\u00f3kin \u00e1fallastreita<\/em>. H\u00fan var yfirleitt ekki bara hluti af sj\u00e1lfsmynd heldur haf\u00f0i h\u00fan n\u00e1\u00f0 a\u00f0 smita heimsmynd skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingsins.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00dea\u00f0 voru \u00ferj\u00fa \u00e1r s\u00ed\u00f0an Sylgja kom \u00ed fyrsta t\u00edmann til m\u00edn. H\u00fan var \u00fe\u00e1 ekki nema tuttuguogsj\u00f6 \u00e1ra g\u00f6mul en haf\u00f0i n\u00e1\u00f0 \u00f3venju langt \u00ed l\u00edfinu. Einhvernt\u00edmann \u00feegar \u00e9g hr\u00f3sa\u00f0i henni fyrir \u00e1rangurinn sag\u00f0i Sylgja a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 v\u00e6ri bara vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 h\u00fan hef\u00f0i aldrei or\u00f0i\u00f0 skotin \u00ed neinum, aldrei s\u00f3a\u00f0 m\u00edn\u00fatu \u00ed \u00e1stina. H\u00fan haf\u00f0i n\u00fdlega veri\u00f0 r\u00e1\u00f0in sem listr\u00e6nn r\u00e1\u00f0unautur hj\u00e1 st\u00f3ru atvinnuleikh\u00fasi, a\u00f0 v\u00edsu \u00ed afleysingarstarfi. H\u00fan var bugu\u00f0 af sj\u00e1lfsmor\u00f0s\u00f3rum sem h\u00fan sag\u00f0i m\u00e9r flj\u00f3tlega fr\u00e1. Fram a\u00f0 \u00feessu haf\u00f0i h\u00fan aldrei sagt neinum fr\u00e1 \u00feessum hugsunum nema spjallmenninu \u00ed s\u00edmanum s\u00ednum, en h\u00fan sag\u00f0ist ekki taka \u00fe\u00e6r s\u00e9rstaklega alvarlega, \u00e1tta\u00f0i sig ekki \u00e1 hvort \u00feetta v\u00e6ru \u00e1r\u00e1ttuhugsanir e\u00f0a hvort eitthva\u00f0 byggi a\u00f0 baki.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c1 \u00e9g a\u00f0 drepa mig?<\/em> spur\u00f0i h\u00fan spjallmenni\u00f0, spjallmenni\u00f0 svara\u00f0i: \u00de\u00fa ert d\u00fdrm\u00e6t. Mundu a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 er alltaf von <\/em>og hvatti Sylgju til a\u00f0 hringja \u00ed ney\u00f0ars\u00edmann 1717. Minnti \u00e1 a\u00f0 h\u00fan v\u00e6ri alls ekki ein. \u00dea\u00f0 var heldur ekki a\u00f0 Sylgja v\u00e6ri \u00e1n vina e\u00f0a fj\u00f6lskyldu, en henni fannst ekki \u00ed lagi a\u00f0 leggja \u00feetta \u00e1 \u00feau. \u00deau yr\u00f0u bara hr\u00e6dd, sag\u00f0i h\u00fan og ekki vildi h\u00fan vera a\u00f0 hr\u00e6\u00f0a f\u00f3lki\u00f0 sem henni \u00fe\u00f3tti v\u00e6nt um.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eOg svo er anna\u00f0,\u201c sag\u00f0i h\u00fan. \u201eEf \u00e9g segi fr\u00e1 \u00feessu, \u00fe\u00e1 gleymist \u00fea\u00f0 aldrei. Sumt sem ma\u00f0ur segir er svona einsog tatt\u00fa. Bara fer ekki heldur er. \u00c9g segi kannski vinkonu minni fr\u00e1 \u00feessu og svo eftir fj\u00f6gur \u00e1r skr\u00f3pa \u00e9g \u00ed veislu hj\u00e1 henni. H\u00fan reynir a\u00f0 hringja \u00ed mig en \u00e9g svara ekki og \u00fe\u00e1 s\u00e9r h\u00fan mig fyrir s\u00e9r hangandi \u00far loftinu heima. Neinei<\/em>, segir h\u00fan vi\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfa sig en alla veisluna eru lappirnar \u00e1 m\u00e9r \u00fearna. H\u00fan n\u00e6r ekki alveg a\u00f0 nj\u00f3ta s\u00edn, brennir hnetusteikina, dansar ekki vi\u00f0 eitt lag, alltaf a\u00f0 reyna a\u00f0 n\u00e1 \u00ed mig … \u00e9g svara ekki … en spjallmenninu er alveg sama … allt sem \u00e9g segi vi\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 er au\u00f0vita\u00f0 l\u00edka einhvers konar tatt\u00fa en \u00fea\u00f0 hefur ekki h\u00fa\u00f0 og finnur ekki til … svo er \u00e9g heldur ekkert a\u00f0 fara a\u00f0 drepa mig,\u201c sag\u00f0i h\u00fan og var mj\u00f6g sannf\u00e6randi, blikka\u00f0i mig l\u00e9tt og brosti \u00fat\u00ed anna\u00f0 og \u00ed lok t\u00edmans sag\u00f0ist \u00e9g vilja hitta hana vikulega til a\u00f0 byrja me\u00f0, sag\u00f0ist vera sannf\u00e6r\u00f0 um a\u00f0 \u00e9g g\u00e6ti hj\u00e1lpa\u00f0 henni. Vanalega hef\u00f0i \u00e9g ekki or\u00f0a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 svona, en \u00fea\u00f0 var eitthva\u00f0 galvaskt \u00ed fari Sylgju og \u00e9g tr\u00fa\u00f0i \u00feessu sj\u00e1lf. \u00deegar h\u00fan haf\u00f0i m\u00e6tt haf\u00f0i h\u00fan heilsa\u00f0 hressilega, gengi\u00f0 beint a\u00f0 glugganum, stutt l\u00f3fanum \u00e1 sylluna og halla\u00f0 s\u00e9r \u00feannig a\u00f0 h\u00fan gat s\u00e9\u00f0 a\u00f0 gleri\u00f0 var fimmfalt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eHv\u00edl\u00edk \u00fe\u00f6gn,\u201c sag\u00f0i h\u00fan og \u00fea\u00f0 var r\u00e9tt hj\u00e1 henni, a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f6gnin var \u00fev\u00edl\u00edk mi\u00f0a\u00f0 vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 r\u00e9tt fyrir ne\u00f0an bygginguna var \u00fe\u00e9ttri\u00f0in hra\u00f0braut.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

H\u00fan sag\u00f0i a\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfsmor\u00f0s\u00f3rarnir h\u00e9ldu fyrir henni v\u00f6ku og a\u00f0 h\u00fan v\u00e6ri farin a\u00f0 eiga erfitt me\u00f0 a\u00f0 m\u00e6ta til vinnu. \u00cd leikh\u00fasinu var h\u00fan annars hugar og \u00e1tti erfitt me\u00f0 a\u00f0 leika rulluna<\/em>. \u00c9g var\u00f0 ringlu\u00f0 eitt andartak, vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 Sylgja haf\u00f0i sagst vera r\u00e1\u00f0unautur en ekki leikari og h\u00fan \u00fatsk\u00fdr\u00f0i.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g meina bara, a\u00f0 leika hlutverki\u00f0 sem \u00feau r\u00e9\u00f0u mig til a\u00f0 leika. Ungur og heitur leikh\u00fasfr\u00e6\u00f0ingur sem er samt l\u00edka n\u00e6gilega mikill l\u00fa\u00f0i til a\u00f0 vera fr\u00f3\u00f0ur. Einhver sem er innan vi\u00f0 \u00fer\u00edtugt en veit samt a\u00f0 agency<\/em> \u00fe\u00fd\u00f0ir atbeini \u00e1 \u00edslensku. Vi\u00f0 erum ekkert mj\u00f6g m\u00f6rg skilur\u00f0u?\u201c \u00c9g gat ekki anna\u00f0 en hlegi\u00f0 a\u00f0eins, vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 var eitthva\u00f0 skondi\u00f0 hvernig Sylgja var. Svona hra\u00f0m\u00e6lt og \u00e1n\u00e6g\u00f0 me\u00f0 sig en samt auglj\u00f3slega svo illa \u00e1 sig komin. N\u00e1nast einsog m\u00e6lsk gr\u00edman hengi laus \u00ed loftinu, nokkra sentimetra fr\u00e1 \u00f6\u00f0ru andliti sem glitti \u00ed gegn, afmynda\u00f0 af vanl\u00ed\u00f0an. A\u00f0 \u00feessu leyti var h\u00fan f\u00f6lsk en \u00e9g tr\u00fa\u00f0i ekki \u00e1 falsheit. \u00d6ll tj\u00e1ning er merkingarb\u00e6r. L\u00edka lygar og falsheit. Allt er eitthva\u00f0<\/em>. Um lei\u00f0 og \u00e9g hl\u00f3 halla\u00f0i Sylgja s\u00e9r aftur \u00ed st\u00f3lnum og \u00fea\u00f0 slakna\u00f0i a\u00f0eins \u00e1 henni.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e… \u00fea\u00f0 er samt \u00ed alv\u00f6ru bara t\u00edmaspursm\u00e1l hven\u00e6r \u00feau sj\u00e1 \u00ed gegnum mig og \u00fe\u00e1 hef \u00e9g ekki einusinni efni \u00e1 a\u00f0 koma h\u00e9rna lengur,\u201c sag\u00f0i h\u00fan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Seinasta athugasemdin stu\u00f0a\u00f0i mig svol\u00edti\u00f0 en \u00e9g greip \u00fea\u00f0 \u00e1 lofti. \u00deetta var ekkert alvarlegt. \u00deessi ver\u00f0lagning var ekki fr\u00e1 m\u00e9r komin og \u00e9g \u00f3ska\u00f0i einskis fremur en a\u00f0 r\u00edki\u00f0 ni\u00f0urgreiddi \u00fej\u00f3nustuna sem \u00e9g veitti. \u00dej\u00f3nustu sem var oft \u00e1 t\u00ed\u00f0um l\u00edfsnau\u00f0synleg og haf\u00f0i j\u00e1kv\u00e6\u00f0 margf\u00f6ldunar\u00e1hrif \u00fat \u00ed samf\u00e9lagi\u00f0. R\u00edki\u00f0 f\u00e9kk \u00feetta \u00feannig allt endurgreitt me\u00f0 v\u00f6xtum a\u00f0 m\u00ednu mati og au\u00f0vita\u00f0 \u00e1tti \u00fea\u00f0 a\u00f0 borga br\u00fasann. \u00deetta gat \u00e9g samt ekki s\u00f3lunda\u00f0 r\u00e1nd\u00fdrum t\u00edma skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0inga minna \u00ed a\u00f0 \u00fatsk\u00fdra og \u00fear af leiddi a\u00f0 \u00e9g sat uppi me\u00f0 a\u00f0 l\u00ed\u00f0a einsog \u00feurftafrekri fr\u00fa, me\u00f0 m\u00ednar lj\u00f3su str\u00edpur og bl\u00e1snu sveigi, d\u00fdru f\u00f6t og d\u00fdra st\u00f3l og glitra\u00f0i \u00e1 allt Swaroski blingi\u00f0 sem H\u00e1var keypti \u00feegar hann kom heim \u00far vinnufer\u00f0 og haf\u00f0i misst af br\u00fa\u00f0kaupsafm\u00e6linu okkar e\u00f0a afm\u00e6linu m\u00ednu e\u00f0a einhverju \u00f6\u00f0ru tilefni.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g hef ekki smekk fyrir \u00feessu,\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00e9g vi\u00f0 hann fyrir l\u00f6ngu en \u00fea\u00f0 henta\u00f0i honum svo illa a\u00f0 hann heyr\u00f0i \u00fea\u00f0 ekki. \u00de\u00e1 hef\u00f0i hann l\u00edka \u00feurft a\u00f0 nota \u00feann t\u00edma sem \u00e1h\u00f6fninni er gefinn hverju sinni \u00ed a\u00f0 \u00fer\u00e6\u00f0a litlar s\u00e9rviskulegar verslanir og finna eitthva\u00f0 sem h\u00f6f\u00f0a\u00f0i til s\u00e9rvitru konunnar hans. Hesta-styttu sem \u00e9g g\u00e6ti b\u00e6tt vi\u00f0 safni\u00f0 mitt l\u00e6gi beinast vi\u00f0, og \u00fea\u00f0 myndi l\u00edka kosta hann miklu minna, en karlar einsog H\u00e1var eru rei\u00f0ub\u00fanir a\u00f0 gjalda t\u00edma sinn d\u00fdru ver\u00f0i og \u00feess vegna h\u00e9lt hann \u00e1fram a\u00f0 hla\u00f0a \u00e1 mig fr\u00edhafnarkristal sem \u00e9g hengdi samviskusamlega utan \u00e1 mig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c6ttingjar m\u00ednir, vinkonur og stj\u00fapb\u00f6rnin hafa hinsvegar s\u00e9\u00f0 til \u00feess a\u00f0 hestastyttusafni\u00f0 hefur fari\u00f0 verulega st\u00e6kkandi \u00e1 undanf\u00f6rnum \u00e1rum og \u00e9g geymi \u00fea\u00f0 \u00e1 stofunni minni. \u00c1 gluggasyllunni og \u00e1 skrifbor\u00f0inu og \u00e1 hillum yfir bor\u00f0inu. \u00deeir eru \u00ed hundra\u00f0atali, af \u00f6llum st\u00e6r\u00f0um og ger\u00f0um. Gler, m\u00e1lm, brons, tr\u00e9, str\u00e1. Me\u00f0 og \u00e1n beislis og hnakks. Heljarinnar st\u00f3\u00f0 sem umkringir mig. Stundum spyrja skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingar hvers vegna \u00e9g safni hestum og \u00fea\u00f0 er misjafnt hverju \u00e9g svara.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eHestar eru me\u00f0 250 sinnum sterkara taugakerfi en vi\u00f0,\u201c segir \u00e9g sumum. \u00d6\u00f0rum segi \u00e9g a\u00f0 hestar t\u00e1kni tilfinningar samkv\u00e6mt draumspeki og einhverjum a\u00f0 mig dreymdi um a\u00f0 vera k\u00fareki \u00feegar \u00e9g var l\u00edtil stelpa. Foreldrar m\u00ednir sendu mig \u00e1 rei\u00f0n\u00e1mskei\u00f0 en \u00e9g vildi ekki vera knapi heldur k\u00fareki. \u00d6\u00f0rum segist \u00e9g ekki hafa hugmynd um hversvegna og enn \u00f6\u00f0rum a\u00f0 \u00e9g er safnari. \u00dea\u00f0 hafi veri\u00f0 tilviljun sem r\u00e9\u00f0i \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 hestar ur\u00f0u fyrir valinu frekar en asnar e\u00f0a uglur e\u00f0a skjaldb\u00f6kur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e … e\u00f0a kannski er \u00e9g bara a\u00f0 b\u00ed\u00f0a eftir a\u00f0 \u00feau losi sig vi\u00f0 mig,\u201c b\u00e6tti Sylgja vi\u00f0 \u00feegar \u00e9g svara\u00f0i henni engu. H\u00fan r\u00e9tti sig vi\u00f0 \u00ed s\u00e6tinu og v\u00e6tti \u00e1 s\u00e9r varirnar, skaut \u00fat h\u00f6kunni og \u00fea\u00f0 var eitthva\u00f0 e\u00f0lulegt vi\u00f0 yfirbrag\u00f0i\u00f0. \u00deegar skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingar ur\u00f0u e\u00f0lulegir \u00ed m\u00ednum huga \u00fe\u00fdddi \u00fea\u00f0 a\u00f0 frumst\u00e6tt varnarkerfi \u00feeirra hef\u00f0i virkjast, sem var alvanalegt og \u00feurfti alls ekki a\u00f0 koma s\u00e9r illa. Svo framarlega sem \u00e9g breyttist ekki \u00ed e\u00f0lu l\u00edka var allt \u00ed g\u00f3\u00f0u.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eHva\u00f0 gerir listr\u00e6nn r\u00e1\u00f0unautur?\u201c spur\u00f0i \u00e9g og Sylgja hugsa\u00f0i sig um.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g sit \u00ed verkefnavalsnefnd og svo vinn \u00e9g sem dramat\u00fargur.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eDramat\u00fargur?\u201c spur\u00f0i \u00e9g og Sylgja glotti.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00de\u00fa veist alveg hva\u00f0 dramat\u00fargur er …\u201c sag\u00f0i h\u00fan og b\u00e6tti svo vi\u00f0 a\u00f0 h\u00fan vissi a\u00f0 \u00e9g v\u00e6ri menntu\u00f0 leikkona. H\u00fan hef\u00f0i flett m\u00e9r upp og s\u00e9\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00e9g l\u00e6r\u00f0i leiklist \u00ed Glasgow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eGu\u00f0, \u00fea\u00f0 er svo langt s\u00ed\u00f0an,\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00e9g, \u201ea\u00f0 \u00e9g er b\u00fain a\u00f0 gleyma \u00f6llu, en j\u00fa, \u00e9g veit hva\u00f0 dramat\u00fargur er. Mig langa\u00f0i bara a\u00f0 heyra \u00feig segja fr\u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed sem \u00fe\u00fa gerir.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g er til taks fyrir \u00fe\u00e1 sem \u00feurfa yfirs\u00fdn og samtal,\u201c sag\u00f0i Sylgja. \u201eLeikstj\u00f3rann, leikarana, svi\u00f0smyndah\u00f6fundinn … og \u00e9g reyni a\u00f0 skilja kjarnann fr\u00e1 hisminu, greini textann, set hann \u00ed samhengi vi\u00f0 samt\u00edmann … og s\u00f6guna, en \u00e9g er a\u00f0allega bara a\u00f0 lesa handrit … og hlusta \u00e1 f\u00f3lk, svona einsog \u00fe\u00fa.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00dea\u00f0 m\u00e1tti greina stolt \u00ed m\u00e1lr\u00f3mnum sem s\u00ed\u00f0an einsog m\u00f6lva\u00f0ist og \u00fea\u00f0 dimmdi yfir svipnum um lei\u00f0 og h\u00fan sleppti s\u00ed\u00f0asta or\u00f0inu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eTil hamingju,\u201c sag\u00f0i \u00e9g og \u00fatsk\u00fdr\u00f0i a\u00f0 \u00e9g ger\u00f0i m\u00e9r grein fyrir a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 v\u00e6ri ekki au\u00f0velt a\u00f0 komast \u00ed \u00feessa st\u00f6\u00f0u.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00deetta er bara t\u00edmabundi\u00f0,\u201c greip Sylgja framm\u00ed. \u201eBara \u00feanga\u00f0 til fastr\u00e1\u00f0ni dramat\u00fargurinn kemur aftur \u00far f\u00e6\u00f0ingarorlofi.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eEn \u00fe\u00e1 ertu komin me\u00f0 starfsreynslu og getur s\u00f3tt um …\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g f\u00e6 br\u00e1\u00f0um skammbyssuna hans pabba.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eSkammbyssu … ?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00deegar hann d\u00f3 var v\u00edst ekkert handa m\u00e9r nema \u00feessi gamla skammbyssa, 9 mm Colt.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eMerkisgripur,\u201c leyf\u00f0i \u00e9g m\u00e9r a\u00f0 b\u00e6ta vi\u00f0 og \u00fe\u00e1 horf\u00f0umst vi\u00f0 \u00ed augu \u00ed fyrsta skipti s\u00ed\u00f0an vi\u00f0tali\u00f0 h\u00f3fst.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eEinmitt,\u201c sag\u00f0i Sylgja og leit strax fl\u00f3ttalega undan. \u201e\u00c9g h\u00e9lt a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 v\u00e6ri enginn arfur og var mest bara hr\u00e6dd um a\u00f0 lenda \u00ed einhverjum s\u00edmreikningi en svo r\u00e9tt eftir a\u00f0 hann d\u00f3 hringdi vinur hans \u00ed mig …\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c9g veit af verknum gegnum lyfjado\u00f0ann og \u00feegar \u00e9g hreyfi mig versnar hann \u00feannig a\u00f0 \u00e9g ligg bara kyrr. Ef \u00e9g opna augun s\u00e9 \u00e9g h\u00f6rlitan vegg og h\u00f6rlitar g\u00f3lfs\u00ed\u00f0ar gard\u00ednur og lj\u00f3si\u00f0 sem sk\u00edn \u00ed gegn er l\u00edka h\u00f6r. \u00deetta ver\u00f0ur dagur \u00e1 g\u00f3lfinu. \u00c9g g\u00e6ti alltaf hringt \u00ed stj\u00fapd\u00f3ttur m\u00edna sem b\u00fdr r\u00e9tt hj\u00e1 og fengi\u00f0 hana til a\u00f0 l\u00edta til m\u00edn, g\u00e6ti panta\u00f0 m\u00e9r eitthva\u00f0 a\u00f0 bor\u00f0a. \u00c9g kv\u00ed\u00f0i \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 \u00feurfa a\u00f0 pissa en \u00fea\u00f0 er allt \u00ed lagi n\u00fana. \u00cd sj\u00e1lfu s\u00e9r er allt \u00ed lagi me\u00f0 mig, hugsa \u00e9g, en um lei\u00f0 rifjast upp dagurinn \u00feegar \u00e9g flutti inn \u00ed \u00feetta h\u00fas. Minning sem er yfirleitt undanfari lei\u00f0inda \u00ed s\u00e1larl\u00edfinu. \u00dea\u00f0 var fyrir l\u00f6ngu s\u00ed\u00f0an. H\u00e1var og barnsm\u00f3\u00f0ir hans h\u00f6f\u00f0u skili\u00f0 \u00ed illu og hann keypti hana \u00fat. Barnsm\u00f3\u00f0irin haf\u00f0i rifi\u00f0 allt me\u00f0 s\u00e9r \u00ed einhverju kasti og hann vann svo miki\u00f0, gaf s\u00e9r ekki t\u00edma \u00ed a\u00f0 koma s\u00e9r fyrir, bj\u00f3 \u00fearna bara \u00ed algj\u00f6rum t\u00e6tingi af s\u00ednu fyrra l\u00edfi og m\u00e9r fannst einsog \u00e9g v\u00e6ri a\u00f0 st\u00edga inn\u00ed \u00f3gr\u00f3i\u00f0 s\u00e1r \u00feegar \u00e9g steig \u00ed fyrsta skipti yfir \u00fer\u00f6skuldinn. Hva\u00f0 var \u00e9g eiginlega a\u00f0 gera? Hvernig datt m\u00e9r \u00feetta \u00ed hug? Hverju bj\u00f3st \u00e9g eiginlega vi\u00f0?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cd herberginu m\u00ednu var l\u00edti\u00f0 snyrtibor\u00f0 me\u00f0 spegli. \u00c1 kv\u00f6ldin sat \u00e9g og horf\u00f0i \u00ed spegilinn og l\u00e9k. \u00c9g l\u00e9k pabba \u00feegar hann hugsa\u00f0i um \u00e1stkonu s\u00edna. M\u00f6mmu \u00feegar h\u00fan vildi a\u00f0 allir vissu a\u00f0 henni lei\u00f0 illa \u00e1n \u00feess a\u00f0 \u00feurfa a\u00f0 segja \u00fea\u00f0. St\u00f3ru systur \u00feegar h\u00fan var g\u00f3\u00f0 me\u00f0 sig til a\u00f0 fela \u00f3\u00f6ryggi, litlu systur \u00feegar henni fannst h\u00fan vera skilin \u00fatundan. \u00c9g l\u00e9k \u00edmynda\u00f0a konu sem \u00feurfti a\u00f0 gefa barni\u00f0 sitt fr\u00e1 s\u00e9r og geifla\u00f0i mig af s\u00e1rsauka. \u00deegar \u00e9g l\u00e1 \u00ed r\u00faminu og reyndi a\u00f0 sofna \u00e1 kv\u00f6ldin l\u00e9t \u00e9g mig dreyma um a\u00f0 vera uppg\u00f6tvu\u00f0. Draumurinn er alltaf eins. \u00c1heyrnarprufan er \u00ed \u00edmyndu\u00f0u leikh\u00fasi. \u00dati \u00ed salnum situr leikstj\u00f3rinn, f\u00fall yfir a\u00f0 \u00e9g skuli vera sein og a\u00f0sto\u00f0arkonan hans segir a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed mi\u00f0ur s\u00e9 \u00e1heyrnarprufunum loki\u00f0.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201e\u00c9g ver\u00f0 flj\u00f3t!\u201c segi \u00e9g og brosi. \u00c9g er me\u00f0 sk\u00e6rbleikar b\u00f3lgnar varir og skjannahv\u00edtar tennur og \u00feegar \u00e9g brosi sj\u00e1st allar tennurnar og nefi\u00f0 \u00e1 m\u00e9r er agnarsm\u00e1tt, einsog l\u00edtill hnappur \u00ed mi\u00f0ju andlitinu. H\u00e1ri\u00f0 allt \u00e1 hreyfingu, li\u00f0ast yfir baki\u00f0, n\u00e6r ni\u00f0ur \u00e1 rass og glansar einog gull og mitti\u00f0 er p\u00ednul\u00edti\u00f0.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201eOk \u00fe\u00e1,\u201c rymur leikstj\u00f3rinn, krossleggur arma og horfir f\u00fdlulega \u00e1 mig en um lei\u00f0 og \u00e9g byrja a\u00f0 leika breytist l\u00edkamssta\u00f0an, gli\u00f0nar \u00f6ll sundur og hann ver\u00f0ur opinmynntur, starir \u00e1 mig, agndofa. Leikstj\u00f3rinn og a\u00f0sto\u00f0arkonan hans og allir sem sitja \u00fearna \u00ed salnum skilja a\u00f0 \u00feau eru a\u00f0 ver\u00f0a vitni a\u00f0 einhverju alveg einst\u00f6ku. \u00d6nnur eins innlifun og sjarmi hafa aldrei \u00e1\u00f0ur s\u00e9st: fyrir augum \u00feeirra stendur leikkona \u00e1 heimsm\u00e6likvar\u00f0a<\/em> og leit \u00feeirra er loki\u00f0.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cd annarri fantas\u00edu st\u00edg \u00e9g \u00fat \u00far gl\u00e6sikerru \u00ed d\u00fanmj\u00fakum pels yfir kj\u00f3l sem er alsettur dem\u00f6ntum. \u00c1 fingrum handa minna glitra tr\u00falofunarhringar og f\u00f3lki\u00f0 sem m\u00e6nir \u00e1 mig \u00far \u00fev\u00f6gunni \u00e6pir nafni\u00f0 mitt. \u00deau eru sj\u00fak \u00ed mig, teygja fram hendurnar og vilja snerta mig, til \u00feess a\u00f0 geta sagst hafa snert mig. Ef \u00feau snerta mig er \u00fea\u00f0 einskonar blessun, einsog \u00feegar ka\u00fe\u00f3likkar vilja snerta p\u00e1fann e\u00f0a bara kyssa j\u00f6r\u00f0ina \u00fearsem sk\u00f3s\u00f3linn hans var. Pinnah\u00e6larnir m\u00ednir skilja eftir blessa\u00f0a kossa fyrir f\u00f3lki\u00f0.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c9g komst ekki inn\u00ed leiklistardeildina \u00e1 \u00cdslandi en hinsvegar komst \u00e9g inn\u00ed alveg \u00e1g\u00e6tan leiklistarsk\u00f3la \u00ed Glasgow. Svo t\u00f3k \u00e9g n\u00e1msl\u00e1n og vann \u00e1 kaffih\u00fasi um helgar. Eftir \u00fatskriftina bj\u00f3 \u00e9g \u00fear \u00e1fram \u00ed tv\u00f6 \u00e1r og reyndi a\u00f0 f\u00e1 hlutverk en \u00fea\u00f0 gekk ekkert hj\u00e1 m\u00e9r. Prufa eftir prufu en ekkert gekk. Svo d\u00f3 pabbi \u00f3v\u00e6nt og \u00e9g nota\u00f0i \u00fea\u00f0 sem \u00e1st\u00e6\u00f0u til \u00feess a\u00f0 flytja heim til \u00cdslands en \u00fear f\u00e9kk \u00e9g heldur ekkert a\u00f0 gera. \u00deetta t\u00edmabil, \u00feessi \u00e1r sem li\u00f0u fr\u00e1 \u00fatskrift og \u00fear til \u00e9g gaf leiklistina endanlega upp \u00e1 b\u00e1tinn, voru \u00ed raun samfellt ni\u00f0urbrot. Prufa eftir prufu \u00fear sem allir brostu og hr\u00f3su\u00f0u m\u00e9r og lofu\u00f0u a\u00f0 \u00feau yr\u00f0u \u00ed bandi en svo heyr\u00f0ist aldrei neitt. Hr\u00e1 birta raunveruleikans t\u00f3k a\u00f0 sk\u00edna inn. \u00c9g gat s\u00e9\u00f0 a\u00f0 varirnar voru einfaldlega of \u00feunnar. Tennurnar of litlar og asnalegar og nefi\u00f0 einsog h\u00e6ll \u00ed mi\u00f0ju andlitinu. H\u00e1ri\u00f0 matt og flatt og bifa\u00f0ist ekki. Mitti\u00f0 ekkert mitti. \u00c9g var lurkur. Luri. Mattur klumpur. L\u00f6ngu s\u00ed\u00f0ar s\u00e1 \u00e9g augl\u00fdsinguna e\u00f0a kvikmyndina e\u00f0a leikriti\u00f0 sem \u00e9g haf\u00f0i m\u00e6tt \u00ed prufu fyrir og \u00fe\u00e1 var\u00f0 \u00e9g ofur-upptekin af ungu konunni sem haf\u00f0i veri\u00f0 valin fram yfir mig. M\u00e9r fannst verst \u00feegar \u00e1st\u00e6\u00f0an var auglj\u00f3s. Au\u00f0vita\u00f0 haf\u00f0i \u00feessi manneskja veri\u00f0 valin frekar en \u00e9g. Allt \u00fea\u00f0 sem mig vanta\u00f0i var\u00f0 svo \u00e1\u00fereifanlegt; glansinn, gl\u00e6sileikinn og h\u00e6fileikarnir. \u00deegar \u00e9g var \u00fer\u00edtug f\u00f3r \u00e9g \u00ed s\u00ed\u00f0ustu \u00e1heyrnarprufuna og \u00fea\u00f0 var nokku\u00f0 sem ger\u00f0ist \u00ed \u00feessari prufu, d\u00e1l\u00edti\u00f0 sem leikstj\u00f3rinn sag\u00f0i, sem ger\u00f0i a\u00f0 \u00e9g f\u00e9kk n\u00f3g.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Samstarfskona m\u00edn \u00e1 stofunni skrifar m\u00e9r skilabo\u00f0. \u00deessi unga kona sem veri\u00f0 er a\u00f0 l\u00fdsa eftir, Sylgja. Var \u00feetta ekki skj\u00f3lst\u00e6\u00f0ingur? vill h\u00fan vita. \u00c9g svara ekki alveg strax. \u00deetta haf\u00f0i ekki komi\u00f0 fyrir hj\u00e1 m\u00e9r \u00e1\u00f0ur og \u00e9g \u00feekkti ekki pr\u00f3t\u00f3k\u00f3li\u00f0. \u00c9g var bundin tr\u00fana\u00f0i vi\u00f0 Sylgju og v\u00e6ntanlega hefur samstarfskonan sko\u00f0un \u00e1 \u00feessu og n\u00fa vill h\u00fan vita meira til a\u00f0 geta mynda\u00f0 s\u00e9r fleiri sko\u00f0anir. Varla \u00e1tti \u00e9g a\u00f0 hringja \u00ed l\u00f6gregluna og segja henni a\u00f0 Sylgja var me\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfsmor\u00f0shugsanir \u00feegar h\u00fan h\u00f3f me\u00f0fer\u00f0? Sj\u00e1lfsmor\u00f0shugsanir g\u00e1tu veri\u00f0 einsog hver \u00f6nnur hugl\u00e6g tj\u00e1ning \u00e1 sorg og \u00f6rv\u00e6ntingu. L\u00f6greglan \u00e1tti bara a\u00f0 finna hana og vangaveltur um eitthva\u00f0 sem h\u00fan sag\u00f0i m\u00e9r \u00ed tr\u00fana\u00f0i fyrir \u00feremur \u00e1rum s\u00ed\u00f0an komu m\u00e1linu ekki vi\u00f0.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00deegar \u00e9g \u00e1kva\u00f0 a\u00f0 h\u00e6tta a\u00f0 reyna fylgdi \u00fev\u00ed l\u00e9ttir, en svo t\u00f3k vi\u00f0 \u00e1kve\u00f0i\u00f0 sorgarferli, einsog \u00e9g \u00e1tti eftir a\u00f0 or\u00f0a \u00fea\u00f0 s\u00ed\u00f0ar, og \u00e9g vissi ekki hva\u00f0 \u00e9g \u00e1tti a\u00f0 gera \u00ed sta\u00f0inn. L\u00edna vinkona stakk upp\u00e1 a\u00f0 \u00e9g ger\u00f0ist flugfreyja og \u00e9g s\u00f3tti um, var send \u00e1 n\u00e1mskei\u00f0 og ekkert svo l\u00f6ngu s\u00ed\u00f0ar var \u00e9g r\u00e1\u00f0in. Loksins var einsog allar \u00feessar eil\u00edfu fyrirst\u00f6\u00f0ur v\u00e6ru horfnar. Framundan var brautin bein og \u00e9g tipla\u00f0i eftir \u00fer\u00f6ngum ganginum, bau\u00f0 brosmild upp\u00e1 veitingar og f\u00f3lk sag\u00f0i anna\u00f0 hvort j\u00e1takk e\u00f0a neitakk, sem var a\u00f0 minnsta kosti alveg sk\u00fdrt. Svo kynntist \u00e9g H\u00e1vari. Kv\u00e6ntum flugmanni sem f\u00f3lk tala\u00f0i illa um, en hann hafna\u00f0i m\u00e9r ekki. Hann valdi mig, f\u00f3r fr\u00e1 konunni sinni, gaf m\u00e9r lykla a\u00f0 h\u00fasinu s\u00ednu \u00ed Gar\u00f0ab\u00e6, bau\u00f0 m\u00e9r a\u00f0 flytja inn, ba\u00f0 m\u00edn, reyndar \u00ed h\u00e1lfk\u00e6ringi tengt einhverri prakt\u00edk, en \u00e9g \u00e1kva\u00f0 samt a\u00f0 taka hann \u00e1 or\u00f0inu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hann var \u00e1 lei\u00f0inni \u00ed bandar\u00edkjaflug og \u00e9g var ekki alveg viss um hvort honum v\u00e6ri alvara, en fyllti samt sk\u00f3dann af f\u00f6tum og \u00f6\u00f0ru sm\u00e1legu, keyr\u00f0i \u00ed Gar\u00f0ab\u00e6inn \u00far gamla Vesturb\u00e6num og lag\u00f0i skakkt \u00ed innkeyrsluna vi\u00f0 tv\u00f6falda b\u00edlsk\u00farinn. \u00c9g haf\u00f0i komi\u00f0 \u00fearna \u00e1\u00f0ur \u00feegar H\u00e1var var enn\u00fe\u00e1 \u00ed hr\u00e6\u00f0ilega hj\u00f3nabandinu s\u00ednu. Einhvern t\u00edmann \u00feegar hans fyrrverandi var \u00ed sumarb\u00fasta\u00f0 me\u00f0 b\u00f6rnin. \u00deau h\u00e9ldu a\u00f0 H\u00e1var v\u00e6ri \u00ed flugi og hann nota\u00f0i t\u00e6kif\u00e6ri\u00f0 og bau\u00f0 m\u00e9r til s\u00edn. H\u00fasi\u00f0 var \u00fe\u00e1 svo gl\u00e6silegt, innr\u00e9tta\u00f0 \u00ed bandar\u00edskum sveitast\u00edl og allt var nokkrum n\u00famerum st\u00e6rra en \u00e9g \u00e1tti a\u00f0 venjast. \u00c9g nefndi st\u00e6r\u00f0 h\u00fasgagnanna og sag\u00f0i a\u00f0 m\u00e9r li\u00f0i einsog L\u00edsu \u00ed Undralandi en H\u00e1var horf\u00f0i bara \u00e1 mig skilningsvana.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00dej\u00f3fav\u00f6rnin f\u00f3r af sta\u00f0 me\u00f0 \u00e6randi h\u00e1va\u00f0a \u00feegar \u00e9g opna\u00f0i dyrnar. \u00dea\u00f0 var myrkur \u00ed holinu og \u00e9g \u00fereifa\u00f0i eftir lj\u00f3srofa, fann loks \u00fej\u00f3favarnart\u00e6ki\u00f0 og sl\u00f3 inn k\u00f3\u00f0ann sem H\u00e1var haf\u00f0i gefi\u00f0 m\u00e9r. \u00dea\u00f0 var \u00f3\u00feefur sem t\u00f3k \u00e1 m\u00f3ti m\u00e9r. Inniloku\u00f0 s\u00far lykt og \u00e9g tipla\u00f0i varlega inn \u00ed h\u00fasi\u00f0. \u00cd teppal\u00f6g\u00f0um stiganum sem leiddi upp\u00e1 a\u00f0ra h\u00e6\u00f0 l\u00e1gu \u00f3hreinar fl\u00edkur og allssta\u00f0ar voru yfirfullir \u00f6skubakkar. Umb\u00fa\u00f0ir af skyndibitamat og bj\u00f3rd\u00f3sir sem h\u00f6f\u00f0u veri\u00f0 kramdar og s\u00ed\u00f0an fleygt k\u00e6ruleysislega \u00ed g\u00f3lfi\u00f0. H\u00fasg\u00f6gnin voru a\u00f0 mestu farin og \u00fea\u00f0 sem var eftir mundi \u00e9g ekki eftir a\u00f0 hafa s\u00e9\u00f0 \u00e1\u00f0ur. Gl\u00e6sileikinn fylgdi fyrrverandi eiginkonunni klikku\u00f0u, \u00e1tta\u00f0i \u00e9g mig \u00e1, s\u00e1 brunafar \u00ed g\u00f3lfteppinu og loka\u00f0i augunum \u00fearna sem \u00e9g st\u00f3\u00f0. \u00der\u00fdsti augnlokunum saman og hjarta\u00f0 sl\u00f3 \u00f6rar. \u00deegar \u00e9g opna\u00f0i augun s\u00e1 \u00e9g a\u00f0 brunabletturinn var munnur sem \u00f6skra\u00f0i af \u00f6llum l\u00edfs og s\u00e1lar kr\u00f6ftum. Ma\u00f0urinn \u00feurfti hj\u00e1lp<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Krist\u00edn Eir\u00edksd\u00f3ttir Drapp fl\u00e6ddi af svo \u00e1reynslulausum \u00feokka yfir alla fleti l\u00edfsins a\u00f0 \u00e9g t\u00f3k varla eftir \u00fev\u00ed sj\u00e1lf. Enginn ger\u00f0i heldur neina athugasemd, nema kannski ein vinkona sem rekur h\u00fasgagnaverslun. H\u00fan kom \u00ed heims\u00f3kn, leit \u00ed kringum sig og sag\u00f0i a\u00f0 n\u00fa v\u00e6ru allir or\u00f0nir vitlausir \u00ed liti. F\u00f3lk vildi bara hafa gla\u00f0legt \u00ed […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-723","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/723","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=723"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/723\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":729,"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/723\/revisions\/729"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stelkur.is\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=723"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}